Posts Tagged ‘self harm help’

How Common Is Self Harm?

Tuesday, September 25th, 2012

Shockingly, 2% to 6% of the general public had engaged in self-harm at least once in their lifetime. Where the peak of self harm actions are among students, ages 16 – 22, see falls in 13% to 35%. For most, the problem will resolve before adulthood but sadly, 10% of the remaining still continues to self harm throughout their adult lives.

With such a high percentage of people doing self harm, it is important that these people receive self harm help from their surroundings. Those around people who self harm should know how to spot self harm signs and actions to be able to give them the help that they need through your own self harm awareness.

Bare in mind that, if you know someone doing self-harm, you should not be horrified and label them “crazy” or “freak” for it brings about more insecurities for them  and it doesn’t help at all; Instead approach them with understanding and acceptance.

It is important to know what drives these individuals to self harm in order to help them resolve their problems. Helping someone who self harms is a noble act; you are fighting their demons with them. People who self harm clearly have reasons as to why they are so unhappy and insecure. These reasons can drive them into injuring themselves, or even to suicide in some extreme cases.

A research stated that the most common cause of reason for self-harm is childhood trauma. It may relate to past-abuse, flashbacks, negative feelings about themselves or any other traumatic events that had occurred earlier. People who suffer in traumatic events may have unstable mood swings and emotions, recurring nightmares and a constant sense of fear. They may also feel numb, disconnected and have problem trusting other people. These are common traits of a trauma survivor, but with care and support it is possible to be able to open up and trust again.

If you notice someone with suspicious injuries or someone confide in you that they are cutting themselves, don’t panic and deal with your feelings first. You may feel shocked, disgusted or even angry, but understand that this is normal and deal with it before you try to help them. These things can help with dealing with self harm so once you’ve done managing your feelings, you help them by acknowledging and understanding their problem, what causes them this pain and urge to self harm; put yourself in their shoes. Then you offer your support without any judgment and unwanted criticism. Know that a person who self harms already feel ashamed and lost therefore you judging them is not in any way helpful. Give them your support by letting them know that you are available.

 

Encourage communication and listen.

Here’s a story of a mother and daughter about self-harm and how they finally got the strength to get help.

Read more at Self-Injury: One Family’s Story

When Is The Best Time To Contact Parents

Tuesday, June 12th, 2012

It is not always the easiest decision to contact parents about their son/daughter’s self harm behaviour or to know when to do so.

 

Students who self harm generally pose a challenge for parents and educators alike. Why people cut themselves is perhaps the least understood of all behaviours in adolescents and this number continuously increases at an alarming rate. Oftentimes, people who self harm do so repetitively but in a Self Harm Awarenesssecretive manner. It is also confounding to know that this behaviour somehow has an intoxicating effect amongst peers in the same group. These students are in need of self harm help. Although the school is not the most conducive environment for treating self harm, it still is an important player when staff have self harm awareness and undergo self harm training.

 

Aside from self harm awareness training, another way forward is for educators and other professionals to identify students and young people in need of self harm help, whilst liaising with parents/carers.

 

Notifying and getting parents involved

Although self harm and self injurycan be very unnerving, when any student is in jeopardy due to self injurious acts, it is school’s responsibility to bring the self harming situation to parents’ attention and to provide resources to resolve the self injury matter. Keep the student/young person informed of your actions and most importantly, involve them in the decision making process. The best time to inform parents of their child’s self harming behaviour varies in every situation. The best time to contact parents is really a judgement call on the educator/professional’s part, however, educators and other professionals have an obligation and duty to do so.

Self Harm

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This can also be a tricky situation and judgement call if abuse within the home is suspected in which case other agencies may also need to be involved. Ultimately, listen to the student or young person and be sensitive to their needs.

 

It is important for both parents and the young person alike to know that there is someone on site at school, college premises or other establishment, that they can turn to in light of any further self harm behaviour concerns or activity. Involving parents in the decision making process is an important aspect, even if the young person doesn’t wish them to be made aware of their self harming behaviour. Again when and how this takes place is an important judgement call on your part.

Top 10 Tips for Self Harm Help For Parents

Friday, April 13th, 2012

Part of self harm help is knowing that being close to individuals who self harm like cutting or burning themselves makes coping really tough and sometimes hard to comprehend. Take note that the reasons why people cut themselves vary from person to person and come in several forms. It is really good to know that included also in self harm awareness is the objective of informing people that self injury or self harm is not suicidal or attention seeking. Normally, self harming pupils do this because they have an immense amount of pain and suffering within them that they find difficult to express. And if your child is one of the many out there who deliberately injure himself or herself, self harm training is available for you as well as resource materials for teachers.

 

How Do I Deal With My Son/Daughter’s Self Harming Behaviour?

It is frustrating for parents to find out that their child is self harming. It is really hard to understand

Parents Understanding Self Harm

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why people cut themselves, especially if they are very dear to us.

 

 

Here are 10 Top Tips for Self Harm Help to guide parents

 

 

  1. Avoid taking things personally. Even if their actions  appear to be manipulative, it generally is not a case of manipulation
  2.  Educate yourself. Backing yourself with the proper self harm awareness knowledge will help you learn how to support your child in the right way.
  3. Take care of yourself. While it is really distressing to realize that your child is self harming, find time to recognize that you also need to adjust. Find time and make sure you also take care of your needs as well as your child’s. You are the important person in this equation, because you need to ensure that you are there tomorrow for both of you.
  4. Be supportive without being imposing. Negative emotions can be triggered sometimes when parents impose what they want on their children, intentionally or otherwise. A better alternative is to let them know that you care for them and you will always be around when they need someone to talk to. Be the first to open up but not be tooParents Understanding Self Harm demanding of them to disclose anything to you. And if your child finds it comfortable to be more open with others, that is ok. Sometimes we need go into protective mode from our loved ones because we don’t want to hurt them. Your child is the same with you. The main thing is that they are talking to SOMEONE.
  5. Be there. Although it is heartbreaking, you have to let your son/daughter know that you are willing to help and will always love him or her no matter what. Reassurance is the key here, and then some.
  6. Encourage them in positive ways. Assurance is something that any child yearns. Express to them that you care even if you don’t always understand where they are coming from, but you will be empathetic and sympathetic to their needs. It is also to acknowledge to yourself that it is difficult for you and you also need someone to talk to about your concerns and feelings. This is am important factor in being able to support your son/daughter.
  7. Observe. Notice the times that your child is upset or moody. Self harm is sometimes hidden because self harming pupils and youngsters shy away from people due to their self harm and or low self esteem.
  8. Avoid impulsive overdoses. You can keep medicines locked up and other sharp edged tools hidden in discrete places to prevent your child from overdoing the damage. That said, do take care to ensure that you help your child to put in place other helpful and alternative strategies and coping methods, otherwise they are likely to find other ‘tools’ to use, which may create far more damage that those they had previously used.
  9. Seek professional help. If you realize that things are already getting out of hand, seek out self harm help to assist your son/daughter in managing their situation.
  10. Analysis of the situation. Sometimes it can be easier for you than others to identify what sparked off your son/daughter’s self harming behaviour. Is there something obvious that happened today, last night or recently that you can think of that may have caused him or her to engage in this current self harming incident? A compromise on both sides may be an option and a way forward if it will ease the situation.

 

We know it is not easy, however, even if you make a start on just one of the above pointers that will help you in moving in the right direction.